Gratitude

Gratitude

Thessalonians 5:18  Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.

I thank my good Lord everyday for all my family and all those I love.  I am heartily grateful for every one of them.  I am even grateful, eventually, for the things that don’t go my way.  All of the experiences in my life, all of the people who have touched my life for good or bad have helped make me who I am.  How I handle the good and bad that come my way helps me grow.  Sometimes I may shut down for a while after a bad experience, and sometimes I have a difficult time letting things go, but sooner or later I do.  Yes this is a bit contradictory to a recent post but we learn things from all our experiences, good and bad whether we realize it or not.  Sounds like psycho babble doesn’t it?  At times I think I am just trying to convince myself!  However, I write what I am feeling, sometimes the feeling is in the moment but usually deeply rooted.

I am grateful for everything, the good, the bad, the beautiful and the ugly.  I have known great love in my life and treasure it.  I know that I am truly blessed and I believe this is why I feel the loss of those I love so deeply.  I think this is true for everyone, the deeper the love the deeper the loss is felt.  And although I have lost people I love the love still exists the love stays with me; I will always love my parents and I will always love Madison.  My heart can be so full of that love that it aches.  I don’t know who I would be without knowing the love I have experienced and experience daily.  The losses in my life help me appreciate that love more and more every day. I have learned that though life is fragile real love is not.  Our love for one another and for God can be completely overwhelming, especially when you think about what some will do for those they love.  What wouldn’t a parent do for a child they love with all their heart?  What sacrifice would a husband or wife make for their spouse?  Think about the ultimate sacrifice that God made for us though we are undeserving..

I believe that gratitude and love go hand in hand.  If I am grateful I show it by how I treat others which is hopefully with love.  A simple thank you, while being appropriate and welcome feels hollow if actions and other words don’t come from love.  Trust me I do at time struggle with the, “other  words,” part.  It’s easy to lose my temper when things aren’t going the way I want or think they should.  Which explains a lot of why I was angry for so long after we lost Madison.  I thought we were taking care of her the way we were supposed to, but I forgot what I always knew.  Sometimes the answer to our prayers is, “no”, or maybe the answer was, “yes” but yes didn’t look the way I thought it would.  I am just grateful that Madison was in our lives for at least a little while.